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The story of the 2014 Chevrolet SS: "Luxury, power, refinement, handling"

Not including the women and men who built it, the 2014 Chevrolet SS has only been seen in person by a piddling number of people - fewer humans than would fill the gymnasium at a high school volleyball game. Not including the men and women who built it, no one has driven it. Even so, it is already saddled with two controversies: the way it looks and the way it shifts.
First to that shifting. Did we love the last Americanized Holden, the awesomely sportsome Pontiac G8 GXP, and its six-speed manual? Of course. Do we wish the SS came with a six-speed manual? Of course. But we'd like a toboggan to come with a manual transmission. We'd put a manual transmission on a weasel if we could because we're just wired that way; if it moves, it should come with a stick and a clutch. Or at least the option.
Let's climb down off the ledge, though. We haven't driven the SS and we have no idea how good (or not) the automatic is. And the Hobson's Choice in transmissions when it comes to sport sedans like the BMW M5, Mercedes-Benz E63 AMG and Jaguar XFR-S and, oh yeah, cars-that-really-should-have-manuals like the Audi R8 and Nissan GT-R and Porsche 918 and every single Lamborghini and Ferrari, for instance, hasn't stopped us from enjoying what is clearly the gruesome, dual-clutched demise of Western automotive civilization. Because in spite of our ululations at the dying of the six-speed light, we understand.

This is your 2014 Chevrolet SS

Think you've waited long enough for this? If so, then you'll want to savor the high-res photos we've so far been given of the 2014 Chevrolet SS, the first rear-wheel-drive performance sedan from The Bowtie in 17 years.
We all know its our version of the brand new VF-model Holden Commodore, but what's under the hood that earns the appellation "performance?" A 6.2-liter LS3 V8 engine producing 415 horsepower and 415 pound-feet of torque. That's 35 hp and lb-ft less than the same engine is expected to produce in the 2014 Chevrolet Corvette. Chevrolet says the sedan will get from 0-to-60 miles per hour "in about five seconds."
Shifting comes courtesy of a six-speed automatic with paddles on the steering wheel, while stopping arrive via four-piston Brembo calipers up front, a single sliding piston in back. The forged aluminum wheels are 19-inchers all around, each set supporting right around 50 percent of the sedan's weight, and the aluminum hood and trunk are meant to keep the center of gravity low.

Use this PowerPoint when convincing your spouse to let you buy a Corvette

When you are not the one in charge of the purse strings, creativity is a must when trying to get the string-holder to bankroll that next shiny object you just can't live without.
When I was a kid, I decided that life wasn't worth living if it weren't in pursuit of owning a GMC Typhoon. My 12-year-old self crafted a fiscal strategy that, when combined with my offer of a 49-percent share of ownership in the car in return for my parents' contribution of 80-percent of the purchase price, would see me behind the wheel of a Typhoon by the time I hit college. They walked away from the negotiating table and, the economic climate of the 8th grade being what it was at the time, another partner wasn't found before the Typhoon was discontinued.
Roy El-Rayes, however, has succeeded where 12-year-old me failed, and he did it by using the sort of professionalism that only a PowerPoint presentation can provide, along with some humor and bold-faced flattery.