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Nissan Qashqai getting Juke-R treatment

As long as there are sacred cows, there will be heretics sharpening their knives in anticipation of the butchering. When Nissan first carved into the mighty GT-R to create the Juke-R, onlookers quickly fell into two camps: those who thought the plan was sheer genius and those who believed cannibalizing a GT-R to feed a Juke was a new brand of obscenity. We fell firmly in the former camp. Now Severn Valley Motorsport is looking to take that theme one step further by shoving the go-faster bits from a GT-R into a Nissan Qashqai. That noise you hear? It's us cackling like mad men.
While we can't say for certain, we're guessing the project should yield the world's fastest Qashqai thanks in no small part to the twin-turbocharged VR38DETT V6 engine from the GT-R. Throw in the all-wheel-drive system and the little CUV should change demeanor dramatically. We can't wait to see this thing in action.

Nissan releases GT-R Nismo N-Attack Package workout video at Fuji

Nissan grabbed headlines last year when it debuted the GT-R Nismo and did a blistering 7:08.679 lap around the Nürburgring's Nordschleife. As it turns out, the GT-R that did that round made use of parts that lowered its weight and improved handling. Nissan calls the extras the N-Attack Package, which stands for Nürburgring Attack, and here is a video showing what its upcoming model can do.
The pack makes a variety of changes to make the Nismo GT-R a better handling car. The suspension and brakes are overhauled with Öhlins adjustable dampers, new stabilizer bar and new front brake pads. As you can see the outside is quite different with carbon fiber components replacing the front fenders and hood gurney, plus an adjustable carbon fiber rear wing with angle adjustments and two height settings. The interior gets a carbon fiber rear bulkhead to cut weight as well.
The release date or price for the N-Attack pack hasn't been revealed, but chief vehicle engineer Noboru Kaneko says that the test in the video at Fuji Speedway was to complete "final checks." So the package might not lag too far behind the standard GT-R Nismo. Scroll down to see the Nissan's pinnacle performance car testing on a cloudy day in Japan and read a brief press release about it.

Man sells testicle to buy Nissan 370Z

We aren't entirely sure what's stranger about this story - that a man actually sold a vital piece of his manhood for a car, or that he did it for a Nissan 370Z. That's not to discredit the trusty Fairlady, a car we generally like, but that if we were to do what Mark Parisi did and sell one of his testicles to science, we'd be asking for a helluva lot more than $35,000.
But Parisi did just that, and announced live on CBS' The Doctors (we really can't make this up) that the sale of his nut would go towards the purchase of a Z. According to our friends Down Under (Australia, get your mind out of the gutter), $35K is the going rate for one slightly used testicle, so if you get nothing else from this story, gentlemen, know that you have $70,000 swinging between your legs.