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Toyota Tacoma helps stand up to your girlfriend, mimes, magicians and the Grim Reaper

It takes a lot to get a product noticed in today's fast-paced world, but one avenue that's always seemed to grab the eyeballs of consumers has been humor. Toyota knows this rule well, and has put together a quartet of spots called "Tacoma Wins," in which the midsize pickup's features and specifications best a number of seemingly worthy competitors.
Whether it be sobbing girlfriends, a circus magician, a grim reaper or the scariest thing of all, a mime, the Tacoma looks well equipped to deal with it. Take a look below for all four of Toyota's newest spots.

Toyota plans biggest stock buyback in over a decade

At the end of December, 2013 Toyota had a cash stockpile of 1.8 trillion yen ($17.5B US). As of March 31, at the end of its current financial year, company coffers are expected to swallow another 1.9 trillion yen ($18.4B US) in net profit - said to be a record sum for the Japanese automaker. In a gesture signaling a turnaround from the horrors of the global recession, Bloomberg reports that Toyota will buy back 60 million shares of its stock, as much as 1.89 percent of the company, for something like 360 billion yen ($3.5B US). It's the first buyback since 2009 and the largest buyback since 2003, when it spent roughly 390 billion yen ($3.8B US) repurchasing shares.
Company president Akio Toyoda founded the Toyota Mobility Foundation (TMF), a non-profit that will support international groups working on transportation issues in emerging markets. Half of the stock that Toyota buys, 30 million shares, will be sold to the foundation via the Japanese Trustee Services Bank for one yen per share, the dividend providing the foundation's initial funding. The other 30 million shares will be canceled, a company spokesman telling Reuters that the company wants to reward shareholders.
Industry analysts have been asking Toyota to either return money to shareholders or invest in new factories, but Toyota has ruled out the latter. After getting burned with excess capacity when the financial crisis came, the company is focused on extracting efficiencies from the plants it already has. Toyota has said it plans to complete the buyback by June of this year.

Fuel cells will flop outside Japan, says VW

"It may fly within Japan, but not globally," VW's Shoji said.
It's long been battered into our beleaguered auto writer brains that the ultimate future source of motivation for tomorrow's cars and trucks is not gasoline, diesel, electricity, natural gas, propane or solar power - it's the hydrogen fuel cell. It's been the Next Big Thing since the start of Next Big Things.